Matthew 19:5-6 “For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh. So they are no longer two, but one flesh. Therefore what God has joined together, let no one separate.”

“And the two shall become one.” Oneness. It is a measure of how close a husband and wife are. When a husband and wife are united in marriage they are no longer two individuals. They are one unit, one team, one flesh. What I do directly impacts my wife. For good and for bad. The words I say, the actions I take, the plans I make. They are not my own any longer. I have to give up using the word mine and instead use the word ours.

It took me a while to understand this. I’m not the best at ours. I’d rather it be mine. Then I can be in full control of it. But ours requires me to share it. I have to give it up freely. I have to risk it. I have to love my wife more than it. Whatever it is. I have to love us, trust us, desire us more than it. I have to daily choose ours over mine, choosing what’s best for us over what I want.

It’s interesting that marriage is the relationship that the Bible uses to describe the relationship between Christ and His Church. Five times in Ephesians chapter 5 the parallel is drawn between husbands and wives and Christ and the Church. Now think of this relationship between Christ and the Church, between Christ and you, in terms of oneness. His desire, His delight, His plan, His focus is on becoming one with us each and every day. Wow!

“This is a profound mystery—but I am talking about Christ and the church.” Ephesians 5:32.