Genesis 32:26 Then the man said, “Let me go, for it is daybreak.” But Jacob replied, “I will not let you go unless you bless me.”
The cry of Jacob’s heart was “Lord, bless me. I will do anything for your blessing. I will not let go until you bless me.” Prior to that night, that encounter with God, Jacob always referred to God as “the God of my father”. He was never Jacob’s God. After that night, Jacob referred to God as, “My Lord”. Jacob’s life was changed that night he wrestled with God.
Have you ever wrestled with God? I mean really wrestled to the point of exhaustion but with a determination not to give up, not to let go, no matter what. You can’t leave an encounter like that with God unchanged. It leaves a mark on you forever. I want that sort of heart. I want that sort of passion. Too often I have given up trying. Too often I have not even entered the fight. I can be so passive. You know the opposite of love is not hate, it’s apathy.
Sometimes I fear that I will never care enough to really wrestle with God. That my heart is so closed off that I won’t let it want anything that badly. Lord help me. Heal my broken heart so that I can love, truly love, you and those that you have put in my life.
How about you? Is there anything in your life, anything that you want so desperately that you would say, “I will not let go until you bless me”? Keep hanging on. Don’t let go!